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Friday, 8th Aug 2008

It’s a very special day today. Not my anniversary, or birthday, but it’s a very so called ‘good day’ for Chinese ppl. 08082008. Chinese always like the number which has EIGHT, which means FATT in Cantonese translation. Well, tonight will be the four years once Olympic which will be held in Beijing. No money to go and watch in Beijing at the moment, so just watch the TV live.

After an interview, I was asked to attend job training in the PCEC (perth convention exhibition centre). It is one of the most happening places in the city as there are lots of VVIP there for meetings, seminars, banquet…..lots more. Thinking of working there will help me to improve my social skills, train myself to be stronger(physically)… So what have I done during the training?
Firstly, I need to understand the company’s background. And after that will be a tour around PCEC. It’s really big, but still cant beat the convention centre in KL. Next will be the training that I have been waiting for. Carrying tray which are full of wine glasses. They are really heavy, and yet there are no liquids on it yet! My hand was shaking. Carrying 2 wine bottles on my hand supporting by 2 fingers each, it’s so tough for me as I have such a small palm and short tiny fingers. My hands are not born for these usage. Carrying plates and collecting them off from the tables with one hand again! Ohno… Holding 2 heavy jugs full with coffee and tea.. asking : Sir/Madam, would u like to have coffee or tea? I’m sorry if I wet you!

This job also requires a certificate of… (Cant rmb, I think it’s F&B) And I have already attended the 3 hrs course and achieved whatever it is needed. So, is this a yes or no? I wanted to give myself a chance, but I think I should leave it aside for the time being. So, went and look for another job, and this is what I found, the fish and chips shop.

Last night, it was my first time working in Australia. The very first job is given to the FISH AND CHIPS shop which is located near my house, a 7 mins walk distance. Thinking of working for 4 hrs for about 2 or 3 days in a week will be fine for me as I only have Uni from Monday to Wednesday. So what is the purpose of working? I can just live with the money given by parents, but thinking of the high living cost in Aust, and the weak currency in msia, I just have to work to earn more pocket money in order to spend on all my necessities. So what are my necessities?
Hmm.. clothes, heels, accessories, food, BOOKSsssss………..and the my travelling plan!!! Cant wait to fly over to Melbourne to meet Ruth, Orsun, cant wait to fly over to Sydney to meet Lili (and also shopping),cant wait to fly over to Adelaide to meet Michelle, Kz, QQ, cant wait to fly over to Brisbane to meet Mel..Aust is really big!!! How much money do I need to travel to all these places? ?How many jobs do I need in order to get all these money??? One thing I don’t like about the job is the heat and oil from the grilling and frying place which I have to do it. I don’t like all these. Looking for another better job which will makes me happier.
Ppl think that staying with relatives are really good. But I think, if I have the chance, I would choose to stay with my friends. Or if I have the chance, I rather not move out of house, or get my whole family migrating here with me!

I just noticed that I am not the only one facing all these problems when staying with relatives. Now I feel that I am normal to think this way. It’s always good to depends on yourself rather than relying on ppl. No matter who they are, they will still be unhappy or complaining or showing faces. I started to have this feeling after 3 weeks of stay here. I didn’t expect it to be so fast. Or am I just over sensitive? Hope what I sense is wrong. Hope all things will go on smoothly. Hope you will bear with me.

I just want to be alone when I am at home, that is why I am always in the room. What else can I do besides staying in the room? TV has nothing for me to watch, I don’t dare to touch your kitchen, although I really want to cook what I feel like eating, but all your kitchen appliances are so expensive, you just came to tell me that the knife was broken due to someone dropping it on the floor or whatever excuses, but that was not me for sure. You like your house to be clean and tidy, I didn’t mess it up. I even help to vacuum. You want your daughter to sleep early because she needs to go to school the next morning. But I am not sleeping at 9.30 or 10pm with her! I have my own living style. I have my own habits. I have my schedule. I have my way of doing my things! You came to warn me: if my daughter does not get excellent in her studies this time, I will scold you. So, what about mine? What if I can’t get good results? Your daughter is super active. She just likes to stick with me. Sometimes I am so annoyed. I want to have my own privacy, as in, sitting quietly and do my stuffs, but she just………..can’t stop it! I am not blaming her, but she has been so lonely for the past 14years, she even asked me not to go back to msia after graduate as she will be very lonely here. Shall I pity you? Or should I ignore all these? I have my sister to play with in msia. Thanks GOD.

I hope I can overcome all these as fast as possible. I know I can do it. I know I must do it. I know I have to do it. I know I have no choice. I know mom will always stand beside me..i miss mommy